Being fun 05/04/2008
 

There's one thing you'll almost certainly need when starting a company: other people's help. The right introduction at the right time can make a world of difference.

How do you get people to help you? If people's interests are aligned to yours, they'll help you out. Those people are called investors. There's another way to get people to help you: make them like you and want to help you.

This ties in with a more general problem that a lot of very technical people face: How can I be a fun person, someone that people want to hang out with?

I was born in France, lived there for seven years, then moved to Casablanca (Morocco) and lived there until I came back to the US for college. Having never spent significant time in the US, I wasn't entirely used to the socializing process when I got here, but I picked up a few simple tips by observing how some of my more popular friends acted. Since I actively did that, I made a mental note of each one. These could generally be summed up as:

"How do I make a good first impression and get people to like me?"

1- Always introduce yourself (with a smile). For some reason, this is really important and labels you as assertive, friendly and outgoing. Make sure you introduce yourself to every member of the group and look them in the eye when shaking their hand. Don't be impolite by interrupting someone, but having said that, there's something very weird about someone who stands around and doesn't introduce themselves.

2- Ask a question. There are a ton of really easy questions you can ask, depending on your social situation. These include general questions, like "Where are you from?" and "What do you do?" as well as more situation-specific ones, like "What company are you with?".

3- Listen to the answer. Keep an open mind and don't assume anything negative. That seems simple, but too many people end up hogging the conversation off the bat by talking about themselves, or judging the other person. However, everybody likes a pleasant person who asks about them, listens, and responds intelligently. They'll usually return the favor by asking about you.

4- Figure out another question to ask based on the previous response. If you can find a way to add some kind of rapport, this is best, like "Oh, you're an engineering major? So am I!" or "You work at Trulia? I have a good friend that works there!". At worst, you should be able to ask for more information: "You go to UCSB? What major are you?"

5- Ask another question. Rinse and repeat.

That's really all there is to it. Besides being generally beneficial to your social life, being a genuinely fun and interesting person has one important benefit to your startup: It makes people want to help you, even if they won't personally benefit from doing so.

In other words, if you get feedback that you're not very "sociable", it is a huge benefit for you to learn to be so. It's not something that everybody is born with, but it is most definitely learnable.

 


Comments

Carla link
05/13/2008 07:04

Hi David I am really sorry to bother you here on your blog , but I cant get into my site - and I am desperate ! Ive tried changing the password about 4 times today and still no luck . Please please advise - My "living" (as in work and income) depends on it ! I also dont get replies on my queries ..??
Thanks so much Carla /South Africa .

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Carla
05/13/2008 11:43

PS - site is www.eishstudioartcarlamaritz.com

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Debbie link
05/18/2008 15:29

Hi David, I ditto Carla up above. Weebly is so bogged down that it's at a stand still and I can't edit or do anything to my site. This is happening on a regular basis here. I've put in 3 or 4 requests with several questions and only 1 question out of all of those has even been acknowledged. You're describing the bounce rate in your previous blog and I can't even get my basic stats to come up for either one of my sites. And no one from support has gotten back with me in days. I'd like to do 2 more sites with weebly, but I don't know...can you please post a notice or blog or something to let us at least know what's going on...please? It might really help alot if you could provide a downloadable version that we can at least edit off-line--so everyone's not having to do it all live. Thanks so much! Debbie

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Brownie
05/30/2008 12:45

I have a site on weebly, and someone went on my site and said it sucked. What should I do about it? I really thought it wasn't very nice... that same person also went on my friend's website and told her to go die! Would you have any advice?

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David Rusenko link
05/30/2008 13:31

Hi Brownie,

I would just ignore this person. They're clearly just trying to make you upset, and getting upset would accomplish their goal.

You can also delete their comment, if you'd like, by logging in to Weebly, going to your blog post, click on "edit", scrolling down to the comments and deleting that comment.

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Zuuci Media link
07/04/2008 14:57

PLEASE HELP. I'm able to sign into my account, but when I get into the "Edit Site" part, it says the page cannot be displayed. It does this every time. I refresh the page over and over. I type the URL in manually. It just won't work. What is wrong?! I don't understand!

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Zuuci Media link
07/15/2008 09:06

Please answer us! ^
:]

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caron link
10/05/2008 21:34

comment for "Being Fun"...
i like your info.
it makes a lot of sense.
sometimes you get stuck behind the computer too long and forget to breathe and just "be".
good advise.
being a good listener is always a great place to start.
thanks.

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